WHERE THEY ARE NOW
* Now it's a disco, but not for Lola: So what happened to that pioneer
music show host, Donnie Sutherland, who hosted the Saturday morning rock
cliparama Sounds (theme song, Barry White's Love's Theme) for 12 years?
He moved to Copacabana, and is planning to install that seminal Barry
Manilow track as his door bell when he finds someone who has the record(sadly,
this column could not help, having worn out its copy).
Our Don lost his job on Sky Channel 11 months ago, and hasn't worked
since, apart from the occasional disco DJ spot. But one sunny day just gone he
was asked to play sleazebag DJ Vince Fontaine in the Grease stage show.
"It's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life," he said.
And on the same day, a Sydney AM radio station called, and someone else is
interested in reviving After Dark - the only rock program ever to be set on a
Here he is in 1975, a year often remembered as the one in which Sounds
began. He is telling the story of how he once made an atrocious record that sold
150 copies. "I suppose I would have another go at it if I could find a song
like the one that Ernie Sigley sings - something simple and easy," he said at
We demand a statutory declaration saying he'll never do an album of Ernie
WEIRD WORLD OF SPORT
* Do I have to have the shrink wrapped? As members and friends of the
Warwick Capper Appreciation Society are well aware, the achieving Warwick may be
in a spot of bother. The word is that Sydney Swans officials were underwhelmed
with allegations that he slapped the face of a St Kilda fan a few weeks ago.
So when club officials trim the list of players in preparation for the
November draft, rumour has it the sporting haircut may be left out. That caused
us to wonder how the owner of the tightest shorts in sport is going in his day
job as a fitter in the denim emporium Just Jeans.
So we called Craig Kimberley, the managing director of Just Jeans (and
director of the Sydney Swans) for a quickie report card, only to get a "no
comment". Sounds like it's time for the Warwick Capper support group (yes, even
the acid-wash division) to start up again.
SPIN US ANOTHER ONE
* Tinkerbell had more street-cred: At last, an ideologically sound
journal has taken serious trouble over discovering why Ms Collette Roberts has
not taken the world by storm.
Not surprisingly, it took the Australian Left Review to give her the
"Firstly I think it's the look ... Collette is self-assured and though
her videos have always been light-hearted affairs, there is nothing fluffy or
cute about her. Secondly, there is the content ... Collette has never been
much about sex, or even love very much" ... while the sexiness of
Dannii(Minogue) and Tina Arena "gives credibility and interest".
Looks as if we'll have to reinterpret Ring My Bell (which we always
thought was a bit of a metaphor) and the non-sporting wearing of bicycle shorts.
But, historically speaking, now that Collette has joined the cast of Home
and Away, things should change.
QUOTES OF THE DAY
* "What trips people out is not only that I created my hairstyles, but
that I cut my own hair ... . I sit where there's a mirror behind me and hold
another mirror in front of me. That way I can see my whole head."
- Owner of the largest mirror in the world and self-made egomaniac Vanilla
Ice in Ice by Ice, the 23-year-old's first autobiography.
* Occasional pugilist and fridge raider Mickey Rourke does not have a lot
to say for Australian director Simon Wincer, who directed his latest film, the
one with a title full of endorsements, Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man. "I
didn't care for the director. He didn't have any balls. Not even one. He came
ball-less," he told the Village Voice.
* Pure Guru: We didn't mean anyone to take our item on Monday about Guru
Adrian's creator, David Art Wales, the wrong way. Specially not his mum, who
called him in New York about it. David's search for patronage through the lonely
hearts columns of New York was never a sexual thing. He has since abandoned the
scheme because the only calls he got were of the non-platonic sort.
"I was hoping for a Margaret-Rutherford-type arrangement and all I got
were Glenn Close types," he said.
But the good news is that Guru Adrian may soon gain a body, and an
animated adventure, because he has just reached the final four in an MTV search
for a new cartoon.
But apart from elation at Adrian's being chosen, "I felt really guilty
because I beat the guy who did Roger Ramjet," David said.
Ever the optimist, he adds, "I'm pleased about what happened to Pee Wee
Herman, with all due respect, because it leaves more room for Guru Adrian."
When David was putting the finishing touches on Adrian for the contest, a
bullet came through his loungeroom window in Greenwich Village and whizzed past
his head. But as Adrian would say, "That's lucky."
And now, for the first time, we give our artist's impression of how the
undisembodied Guru Adrian will look, as described by his creator. He is wearing
a drab olive windcheater, and matching car coat, little blue shorts, and cute
clumpy shoes in the style of Elmer Fudd.